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Italian Wedding Customs and Traditions
30 Apr 2006
Italian Wedding Customs and Traditions
Italy is a country replete with tradition, and weddings are no different! Wedding customs designed to ensure a long and happy marriage are an integral part of Italian culture. In fact, many matrimonial traditions celebrated all over the world have their roots in Italy!
Diamond engagement rings date back to medieval Italy…it was believed that diamonds were created by the "flames of love"!
An old folklore tradition holds that a bridegroom that carries a small bit of iron ore in his pocket wards the evil eye away from his wedding ceremony.
The wearing of a bridal veil is another wedding tradition that began in Italy. The veil is a symbol of virginity, and the covering of the bride's face means she has never "known" a man before.
Older church traditions held that the luckiest day to get married on was Sunday. However, marriages during Lent or Advent were often forbidden and the entire months of May and August weddings were also frowned upon as being harbingers of bad luck to the bride and groom.
The traditional wedding mass or ceremony (sposalizio) often takes place in the morning, allowing the bride and groom some quiet time together afterwards while family and friends prepare for the reception festivities.
In some small Italian villages, it is common for the bride and groom to walk to the village square together after the wedding mass. In the square, the family and friends of the couple set up a sawhorse, log, and double-handled ripsaw. The bride and groom must work together to saw the log in half, representing the teamwork it takes to have a successful marriage.
In some regions, the bride and groom shattered a vase or large glass together and the number of pieces were said to represent the number of happy years they would spend together.
A more modern tradition is the release of a pair of white doves after the ceremony by the bride and groom to symbolize the couple's love and happiness.
The tradition of candied almonds being given at wedding receptions comes from Italy. The treats are meant to represent both the sweet and bitters aspects of life…a tangible reminder of "for better or worse". The candies are often wrapped in tulle, and given to each guest inside a small pottery or glass dish as a wedding favor.
The reception usually begins in the afternoon and carries on until the wee hours of the next morning.
Drinks (sweet liquors for the women and stronger drinks for the men) are served as an aperitif before the banquet feast. A commonly heard wedding toast is "Per cent'anni", meaning "for a hundred years".
The wedding feast often begins with antipasto and continues with a sumptuous multi-course dinner. Symbolic wedding foods include wanda (small bits of twisted dough covered in powdered sugar) and Italian wedding candy. After the meal, wedding cake is served with espresso and other coffees.
The Tarantella, a traditional wedding circle dance, is an integral part of the reception celebration…everyone takes part!
The La Borsa is a small satin bag carried by the bride that attending guests could slip gifts of money in to. The money traditionally went back to the brides family to help pay for the expenses of the occasion.
Sometimes the groom's tie is cut into pieces and the pieces are "sold off" to reception guests. The cash is then given to the bride and groom to use on their honeymoon.
Instead of paint and streamers, the bride and groom's car is often decorated with fresh flowers to symbolize a new and happy life together. Faith Harper is a freelance writer who resides in Houston, TX. She can be reached at WredenHarper@aol.com
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Throw a Traditional Italian Wedding
Despite what you might think, you don't have to be a sun-kissed couple fresh from the shores of Sicily in order to have an Italian wedding. A couple of Italian descent are more than welcome to weave Italian traditions into their wedding -- whether or not they've ever set foot in Italy.
Many of us find that the most satisfying weddings combine nostalgic old traditions with contemporary ways of doing things. And old religious observances, historic dances, and traditional Italian foods are sure to give your wedding a warm Italian heart.
As everyone knows, Roman Catholicism is Italy's primary religion. So a traditional Italian wedding typically means a traditional Catholic wedding as well, including a full mass with the ceremony. However, it's still true that not every Italian is Catholic. Although it may be a bit unusual, if you and your partner aren't Catholic, you can still incorporate the Italian traditions in your reception. One of the most charming is the dove release, symbolizing the love and affection of each newlywed for the other, although this tradition is not very old.
No Italian wedding is complete without a few traditional dances, such as the Tarantella. Although the Tarantella's origin is somewhat murky, most of the stories about it involve a spider bite, and tell of a dance either meant to counteract the venom, or one that simply mimics the uncontrolled motions of the sufferer. At any rate, these days the Tarantella is performed at wedding parties to wish the couple a fine future together. Participants form a circle and dance in a clockwise direction, until the music speeds up and the dancers must change direction. The tempo changes several times, each time forcing the dancers to change direction and dance even faster. The Tarantella continues until it becomes impossible to keep up, and the dance falls apart.
What's the most distinguishing aspect of an Italian wedding? The food, of course. The Italians invented the evocative word abbondanza, which somehow means something more than mere "abundance," and no Italian wedding would be complete without an overwhelming feast of many courses. Traditionally, the wedding reception begins with an antipasto course of cheeses, olives, mushrooms, and pickled sweet peppers. This course is followed by subsequent courses starring pastas, meats, salads, soups, and desserts, each one punctuated by freely flowing wine.
It's interesting to note that some of the foods at an Italian wedding have symbolic overtones. For example, the giving of sugar-coated almonds to guests symbolizes that marriage is both bitter and sweet. The number of almonds given is associated with traditional meanings: for example, three almonds speak to fertility, while five almonds wish for wealth.
Another authentic Italian wedding tradition is the breaking of a glass at the reception's end, somewhat like a similar tradition within the Jewish faith. However, the deeper symbolism underlying these traditions is very different. Within Judaism, the broken glass symbolizes human frailty and the hardship the couple's ancestors endured as a result of their faith. But in Italian weddings, the broken glass points toward the future. The number of shards is said to predict the number of happy years the couple will have together.
It's deeply satisfying for couples of Italian descent to weave these traditional elements into their modern-day wedding. Even if only your distant relatives still reside on Italian soil and you've never been to Italy, it's still absolutely fine to follow these traditions. And that's not to say you have to be Italian, either -- all that's required is that you appreciate the richness of Italian culture and are willing to try something new.
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