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Traditional Italian Wedding Customs
13 Jul 2006
In the Italian culture, a wedding has always been the most joyous of
occasions. Incorporating some of these traditional Italian elements into your
wedding is a great way to either pay homage to your heritage or to simply add a
touch of Italian flair to your theme. Filled with fun, festivities, and most of
all FOOD a traditional Italian wedding is always guaranteed to be great fun for
all.
• The wedding day begins with an early mass and concludes with dancing and lots
of food in the evening and into the morning.
• The month of May is to be avoided as a wedding month, as it should be reserved
for the veneration of the Virgin Mary.
• August is also an unpopular month to be married; it is thought to be bad luck
and bring sickness.
• Marriages on Sundays are thought to be the luckiest.
• Rain on the wedding day is considered lucky - “Sposa bagnata, sposa
fortunate.”
• The groom should carry a piece of iron in his pocket to ward off the evil eye
• In earlier days, the groom would bring the bouquet as a surprise for the
bride, as a gift from the grooms family to her.
• A ribbon may be tied to the front of the chapel to symbolize the bond between
the couple getting married
• Traditionally, the bride wore a veil to hide her from jealous spirits
• Tearing the veil is thought to be good luck
• Wearing gold during or before the wedding is thought to bring bad luck. The
bride should refrain from wearing gold until after the wedding.
• Drinks are served before dinner to toast the bride and groom.
• After dinner, cake is served with espresso, coffee or other beverages.
• All men may kiss the bride at the reception for good luck.
• The bride will carry a silk purse while visiting each guests to store monetary
gifts and cards
• The cookie dance - The bride and groom lead dancing guests over to the cookie
cake, where each guest will take a cookie
• Dessert tables are often common, where rather than just the wedding cake,
there will be a medley of delicious dessert to choose from
• In the past, the best man would cut the tie of the groom into pieces, then
sell them to guests. The proceeds would go to pay for the reception or
honeymoon.
• During the reception, the bride and grooms friends may sneak away to play
tricks on the couple
• The candy covered almond favor (known as confetti) was originated in Italy, as
an item to throw at the bride and groom to ensure fertility. It is important for
them to be tied in odd numbers in mesh bags, as odd numbers will bring good
luck.
• Rice or paper confetti is also traditionally thrown at the couple to symbolize
money and good fortune
• At the end of the wedding, Italians may break a vase or glass. The number of
pieces were to be the number of years they would be married happily.
• Rather than a receiving line, it is tradition that the couple visits each
table individually before slipping away for their honeymoon
• The bride and groom will leave the wedding without opening any gifts. The
bride’s family takes on this task.
Angela Phelan
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Throw a Traditional Italian Wedding
Despite what you might think, you don't have to be a sun-kissed couple fresh from the shores of Sicily in order to have an Italian wedding. A couple of Italian descent are more than welcome to weave Italian traditions into their wedding -- whether or not they've ever set foot in Italy.
Many of us find that the most satisfying weddings combine nostalgic old traditions with contemporary ways of doing things. And old religious observances, historic dances, and traditional Italian foods are sure to give your wedding a warm Italian heart.
As everyone knows, Roman Catholicism is Italy's primary religion. So a traditional Italian wedding typically means a traditional Catholic wedding as well, including a full mass with the ceremony. However, it's still true that not every Italian is Catholic. Although it may be a bit unusual, if you and your partner aren't Catholic, you can still incorporate the Italian traditions in your reception. One of the most charming is the dove release, symbolizing the love and affection of each newlywed for the other, although this tradition is not very old.
No Italian wedding is complete without a few traditional dances, such as the Tarantella. Although the Tarantella's origin is somewhat murky, most of the stories about it involve a spider bite, and tell of a dance either meant to counteract the venom, or one that simply mimics the uncontrolled motions of the sufferer. At any rate, these days the Tarantella is performed at wedding parties to wish the couple a fine future together. Participants form a circle and dance in a clockwise direction, until the music speeds up and the dancers must change direction. The tempo changes several times, each time forcing the dancers to change direction and dance even faster. The Tarantella continues until it becomes impossible to keep up, and the dance falls apart.
What's the most distinguishing aspect of an Italian wedding? The food, of course. The Italians invented the evocative word abbondanza, which somehow means something more than mere "abundance," and no Italian wedding would be complete without an overwhelming feast of many courses. Traditionally, the wedding reception begins with an antipasto course of cheeses, olives, mushrooms, and pickled sweet peppers. This course is followed by subsequent courses starring pastas, meats, salads, soups, and desserts, each one punctuated by freely flowing wine.
It's interesting to note that some of the foods at an Italian wedding have symbolic overtones. For example, the giving of sugar-coated almonds to guests symbolizes that marriage is both bitter and sweet. The number of almonds given is associated with traditional meanings: for example, three almonds speak to fertility, while five almonds wish for wealth.
Another authentic Italian wedding tradition is the breaking of a glass at the reception's end, somewhat like a similar tradition within the Jewish faith. However, the deeper symbolism underlying these traditions is very different. Within Judaism, the broken glass symbolizes human frailty and the hardship the couple's ancestors endured as a result of their faith. But in Italian weddings, the broken glass points toward the future. The number of shards is said to predict the number of happy years the couple will have together.
It's deeply satisfying for couples of Italian descent to weave these traditional elements into their modern-day wedding. Even if only your distant relatives still reside on Italian soil and you've never been to Italy, it's still absolutely fine to follow these traditions. And that's not to say you have to be Italian, either -- all that's required is that you appreciate the richness of Italian culture and are willing to try something new.
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